Tommy John Long Sleeve Undershirt – FTW!

I finally did it. I won something from … finally. Everyone knows I’m a fangirl (even Jason’s mom, which is weird enough), so I have attempted to win things before. I gotta say, super stoked that I held out.

I won a shirt from Tommy John. There was some controversy surrounding my win, as Tommy John shirts are for dudes, and I’m not a dude. Mr. John (if that’s his name — I have no idea) set out to solve a specific problem which is, from what I hear, the way to be successful in business. The problem, however, was one that did not affect me (or most chicks) AT ALL. Apparently, boys wear “undershirts” to, like, not show “nippage” or sweat or something, and apparently said undershirts have a nasty habit of not only being not so comfy, but also riding up and generally not performing well. I likened it to a really il-fitted bra. So off to problem solving he went, and he came up with this amazing super stretchy shirt that is about as soft as humanly possible and it does this one awesome thing…

You know those commercials for tempurpedic mattresses where you put a glass of cheap red wine on one corner of the bed, and that chick and her lover jump on the other end of the bed in a weird pre-mating ritual, but the glass of red wine doesn’t move or spill or get drunk? (Artistic license utilized.) Well, it’s like that. Sorta.

When you pull on one corner of the shirt in a sheepishly girly kinda way, the rest of the shirt doesn’t move. It’s like a party trick! When you’re the only one at the party, and the trick is you’re wearing a shirt.

Anyway, this shirt I got is the outwear longsleeve shirt in black (so slimming). I love it lots. I wear it after the gym and around the house. In the winter I’ll more than likely sleep in it… every night.

So I guess I just wanted to thank Jason over at (@iwearyourshirt) for the win-assist, and Tommy John for the shirt. I love it.

But I love your website more because it is about as NSFW as possible while still being SFW (mannequin porn!).


May 24, 2009 at 3:31 pm Leave a comment

81 Pushup (in 5 minute) Challenge – WIN!

Week 2, Day 3 proved to be the last day of my hundred pushup challenge. I had started to feel a twinge in my back around Pushup 60 of my 81 that day, and by 81 of 81 I was in full on pain.

I gave it a good go. I am in PT now working on my OTHER back issue (5 years of sciatica and counting), and I have been assured that by building my core strength,  I’ll help both issues at once.

I don’t want to say I’ve failed, nor have I given up. But my pushup days are over for now. 81 big-girl pushups in 5 minutes. I can officially say that Jason Sadler (@iwearyourshirt) dominated me at pushups.

Sorry for the disappointment. Bring on the next challenge. I’m ready.

May 5, 2009 at 1:54 pm 2 comments

Hundred Pushup Challenge – “I’ll leave pushups to the boys”

I told my best friend, the Cultural Contributor, about the Hundred Pushup Challenge. She is typically… skeptical of my antics, but ultimately supportive. This proved no different.

Gymrat Jane: “So, I’m doing this thing. It’s called the Hundred Pushup Challenge. You shoul do it, too!”

Cultural Contributor: “Like, girl pushups or real pushups?”

GJ: *Eye roll* “Real pushups. Big-girl pushups!”

CC: “But, like, don’t pushups give you big pecs? Aren’t those boy muscles?”

GJ: “Well, no. Not really. I mean, I need all the help up there I can get. It’ll make me look like I’ve got cleave!”

CC: “Yeah. I think I’ll leave pushups to the boys.”

It’s something I’ve thought about, though. I am in no way a body builder, but I am a bit muscley. I worry that it might be too… masculine.

Are muscles for  boys?

I feel like women are told to be looong and leeeean a la pilates. I never really learned how to lift weights. I just started lifting. Perhaps I chose the wrong method of lifting. Bobby(@xfitjax) said he’d help me come up with a workout and Jason (@iwearyourshirt) said he’d send me his “clean diet” spreadsheet to help me get rid of my fat. But he said it’s hard and I don’t know if I can emotionally handle “hard eating” right now.

My body insecurities don’t have to do with my muscles. I know that I’m not single because I can benchpress more than most girls. I’m not doing the hundred pushup challenge to bulk up or get fit. I just love being strong. Fake it til you make it, I guess. Strong on the outside maybe means strong on the inside? Eventually?

Yesterday was Week 2, Day 1 (I’m in Group 3) of the chalenge: 14, 14, 10, 10, 15. 63 total? Stupid math.

So while I may end up with big pecs, I don’t think I’ll leave pushups to the boys. I’m having too much fun.

April 28, 2009 at 11:25 am 5 comments

I was Dominated by Bobby (@xfitjax) in Pushups

The bet: Jason of couldn’t do 30 pushups in a row, and 100 pushups in 5 minutes.

The stakes: Whoever wins has to post a picture declaring they were dominated by the other participant to all possible outlets (Flickr, Facebook, Blog, Etc.).

The results: I wish I could claim complete domination, but Bobby (who is absolutely ADORABLE, even in Pink — and whom i wasn’t aware was participating in this little contest… *ahem*) was able to crank out 100 pushups in 5:02 and given that we didn’t have an official stop watch, we gave it to him. Poor Jason… poor poor Jason… He and his 250 lbs of muscles were able to get through his 30 consecutive, but stopped short of 100, squeezing out 84.

Then, the challenge was put back on me… Could I manage 30 in a row? Hmm? HMM!? Never able to turn down a physical challenge, I kicked off my cute little kitten heels and got down on my office floor (under my desk in order to shield me from the possible passers by) and cranked out 28 consecutive pushups. I give myself credit. A) I was in my work clothes, B) I had already done my pushups the night before and was supposed to take a day off, C) I’m a chick who can do 28 Big Girl Pushups!!

So while I beat the pants off of Jason Sadler, unfortunately, I was pwned by Bobby and now I must pay. Here is my penance.

I was dominated by Bobby (@xfitjax) in pushups.

I was dominated by Bobby (@xfitjax) in pushups.

But I COMPLETELY DOMINATED Jason (@iwearyourshirt)!!!

But I COMPLETELY DOMINATED Jason (@iwearyourshirt)!!!

April 24, 2009 at 11:38 am 3 comments

Hundred Pushup Challenge

Hello there. Been a while, eh?

I have come back to issue a challenge. Well – to document a challenge that has been issued (or some such nonsense).

It’s the Hundred Pushup Challenge – A program designed to get anyone to complete 100 consecutive pushups in 6 weeks. It’s based on a book from what I can tell, but I should also mention up front that I’m not promoting the book in any way. Unless they eventually pay me. In which case I’ll totally pimp that. :)

The challenge was issued on Twitter. @AliHolden I believe was the one who brought it up. She was challenging @MaryCateOMalley to see if they could do it. I am not a “see if you can do it” kind of person, so naturally I made it slightly more competitive. Then, like the genius that I am, I threw the gauntlet down to Jason Sadler of (@iwearyourshirt), this megabuff shirt-trepreneur who happens to be wearing a different t-shirt every day this year, essentially selling his life Star Jones style. Kind of. He’s awesome and I’m a fan-girl, so when he accepted the challenge, I knew it was GAME F-ING ON! Well, then I decided to just challenge everyone. My friend Chaz jumped on board, and now my cousin is in!

Here’s how it works….

You take the Initial Test to see where you start. It’s “do as many pushups as you can”. So I did. I got 20 , so for my age, that puts me at level 3. You can start at 0, although they kind of recommend not so much that.

Then … you start.

The entire program can be found on their website. Here is Week 1. Since I’m level 3, my first workout consisted of 5 sets: 10, 12, 7, 7, asmanyasyoucanbutatleast9 (I did 10) with one minut’s rest in between sets. My total was 46.

Since I did my test and my week 1 in the same night, my total (non-consecutive) for the night was 66. Suuuuuucky but I was only moderately sore in the morning.

Today, Jason challenged me to record myself doing my pushups… something I was VERY skeptical of doing for a number of reasons. A) I’ve been anonymous up until now. B) I’ve never recorded myself. C) It’s be in my ratty-ass gym clothes doing PUSHUPS. But you know I can’t turn down a challenge, especially not from a boy.

So I did it. Today was Hundred Pushup Challenge Day 2. 5 sets: 10, 12, 8, 8, asmanyasyoucanbutatleast12 (I did 15). Total today? 55 53 (Thanks, PRSlaveDC. And Jews ARE good at math. Just not me. I suck.).

And, as promised…. Video.

Hi. I’m Lisa.

April 23, 2009 at 2:33 am 6 comments

The “Resolutionaries” Are Back

Go home. Seriously. I mean – OK, that’s not a nice thing to say but it doesn’t make it less true. I have 100% full respect for the folks out there who make new years resolutions to slim down and shape up. I do.

But why do you all have to do it at once?

You are clogging my gym and taking my machine and you don’t have one ounce of gym ettiquette and it’s not that you shouldn’t be there but can you perhaps make your big resolution in, like, March? Or perhaps resolutions can be done by last name: A-K in January, L-P in June, Q-Z in September.

Here’s my theory, and please take this with all the compassion in the world: If you make a “resolution” you are bound to fail.

It’s time sensitive. “I will start going to the gym in January!” But let’s say the kids karate is running late more often than not or you get the flu or your shoes are worn out and you asked for the new coach purse instead of running shoes, so what’s the point?  You go the first week but you can’t make it the next. Or you go the first two weeks but February is a dud. So you give up and you say, “Maybe next year!”

But I am solution oriented, of course. So here’s my plan: Make your “resolution” in March. Or April. Or halfway through October. What does this accomplish? Well, A… it gets the influx of non-gym-using newbies out of the gym. B if gives you a chance at success! You aren’t making a true resolution in March. You’re making a decision to change. A life decision. The decision to start anew without the baggage of your old life, but more importantly without the pressure of the new year.

I am a firm believer in making a change. I did it myself. One day I woke up and said, “OK – doc says I need to lose weight and today is the day.” It was March. It was perfect.  I didn’t say “tomorrow” or “in the new year.” I said, my life was my life yesterday and it will be tomorrow and I don’t need some big event to get my life in gear.

If I sound bitter it’s not because I want you to fail. Rather, it’s because I want you to succeed and I know you aren’t going to do it this way. And in the meantime you’re taking up all the fucking ellipticals and stacking the weights like a jerk.

OK. Maybe that is a little bitter.


January 6, 2009 at 5:00 am 5 comments

Who’s spotting who?

Remember this guy? Becuase I haven’t posted in, um, forever… I’ll do a quick recap.

Growing up I was the biggest loser. There were a few cool, older kids who made my life a living hell for the majority of my formative years so naturally I had a major crush on them both.

From twerpy, annoying neighbor, I moved straight to fat and angry. Not exactly what the cool kids are looking for in “arm candy” — not who you want to take to the prom, for sure.

Fast forward 12 years, a lot has changed. I moved back to the area, dropped a bunch of weight, calmed-the-fuck-down about a lot of stuff and generally ended up a way better person. But living in the same area in which I grew up, it’s natural that I’ll run across a number of characters from my past — one of the aforementioned cool kids included.

For months and months I saw him at the gym almost every single day. He said nothing. I assumed he was as aloof as he had been so many years before. Through the magic of the internets, I found him on Facebook and added him as a friend without saying a word. I knew he’d know my name, and lo and behold he accepted. But I didn’t know how to broach the whole “hey you see me every day and don’t say anything” subject. Until a thread of old neighborhood kids got going and I had my chance.

We are going to have a neighborhood reunion come Christmas, mostly so all of my old neighbors can show off their hot new wives/husbands and we laugh about all the ridculous shit we got into as kids. We had been emailing around about it for a few days. About 50 messages or so in, I was like – “Hey – so, you know I see you all the time at the gym, right?”

“Well, I thought I saw you once but I have tunnel vision at the gym.”

I didn’t bother reiterating that I see him… constantly. I just said I’d be sure to say hi next time I caught his eye. Two weeks later, I did. He actually saw me first as I came down the stairs and he stuck his pierced tongue out at me. I know I had a stupid grin on my face – I was about to talk to one of the hottest guys at the gym, a guy who hasn’t actually seen me for 12 years. (Thank GOD I didn’t wear my tube socks that day.)

I was shocked by a few things. His incredibly high voice, for one. His ugly earrings, too. But really I was shocked at how nice he was. He certainly didn’t “look” nice. He looked hard. He looked like a tough guy. But he wasn’t kidding. When he’s at the gym he is just in a zone. I could tell that I drifted in and out of his consciousness as I worked out around him.

We ended up a machine away from each other at some point. He was on the fly machine and I was on chest press. He looked up from the floor – his between set behavior – and asked… “Hey, Jane. Can you spot me?”

I looked at his stack – 250lbs. “Um – sure.” He wanted to do 6-8. And he looked like he could get it. I was merely, um, there for show. I hoped. In the end, I did spot him, 2 sets – 2 assisted reps. About my limit, really.

It was such a great full-circle feeling for me. I know that we should all be past high school at this point. Certainly past our childhood. But it wasn’t that easy for me. More and more I can see myself growing as a person, but the increments are so small that they are sometimes difficult to see while they are happening. It’s times like these where I see exactly how far I’ve come.

I spotted him at the gym. I spotted him IN the gym. It was a good feeling. And now I have a new gym-friend.

November 7, 2008 at 12:02 pm 2 comments

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